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I'm so sorry...
Seven years of silence... Seven years of lies I left to fester and rot, like a fake corpse in a fake grave... Seven years too late for me to make everything right. To all of you who see this; Hello. It has been some time, I know. This is boo133, the young artist who joined this site and shared his drawings with you all about a decade ago... But, regrettably, the same boo133 who lied to everyone about himself, thinking it would help when all it did was hurt them even more when he finally buckled under the weight of everything around him. ... To those of you I talked to at length, you know that my upbringing wasn't the best. My home life was hostile. My parents were abusive, my siblings indifferent, and my city a place of cold hatred for people like myself. But what you don't know is that it was all ongoing... I was still a child, not the strong, grown, empathetic individual I claimed myself to be. When I made this account, when I met and talked to you all, I was as young as 14. Being a stupid kid, and this being the internet, I played myself up as an adult, hoping it would make everyone think better of me. Make you all feel like I was someone worthy of admiration. Some of you were even told I was as old as 24... The age I took a decade to make true. This wasn't TOO big of a problem.... Until I became more of a character than myself... Until I made everything complicated and awkward with all of you. When I was barely 16 or 17, my parents decided to drop me out of school. After that,, I had a massive panic episode that lasted for some time,, and after THAT I realized I had caught myself in a web I was certain I couldn't untangle. With all of that happening in such rapid succession I just.... Broke. My will, my confidence, even my faith in myself as an artist... It was all melting away before me. I was scared I was going to hurt everyone. I was scared I would make them hate me. So instead of standing back up and facing the mess I made.... I ran away... Like the child I was. After that, I was convinced I was destined for an early grave. Not suicidal, per se, but in a situation with my life that I was certain I would be dead before I would even be able to smoke or drink. That is... until an unforeseen event turned everything around for me. Authorities took me away from my parents to live with a relative, who took me in, helped me finish my education, and got me truly ready to live in a world I was certain would have nothing to do with me up until then. If it wasn't for the friends and family I had... I wouldn't have made it through life like this. But..... I didn't return. I left you all in the dark... Too scared to know the trouble I caused, too scared to confront myself, and too scared to stop covering my eyes and ears like I was still a child. ... But then, it stuck to me. It clung to me and kept growing and growing and growing, an unbearable guilt that would eventually crush me if I didn't do something. Even if I was too late. Years passed by, and, up until now, I kept looking away from all of you... Until I realized that, in not wanting to hurt anyone, I hurt you in way that was so much more profound. So I... I wanted to come back one last time and tell you all the truth. To shine some light and offer closure on a scenario that shouldn't have been hidden to begin with. And to say goodbye to you all as I close out this chapter of my life and try to better myself. ... If this all sounds "Final," please don't worry. I may not be the best off, still, but I am going to keep living. I am nowhere near as talkative as I used to be, but I am willing to read any notes you may wish to send me. I don't blame any of you if you hate me. Honestly, I am not happy with what I did, either. I am going to deactivate this account in the next week. Thank you all for your time, and my deepest apologies for all the hurt I caused. I can never undo what I did. Sincerely, ~boo.
Back
Not much to say... I was gone, now I'm back... Hooray~.... Maybe.
GGGC WishList
To my secret santa at #GG-Gathering-Chaos (https://www.deviantart.com/gg-gathering-chaos)
Okay, okay. So, year three, we all know the MAGICAL DRILL~!
I just want to have something you put effort into, preferably about me or any of my characters in the gallery.
But.... There is one thing you could do to make me fain from joy.
I have taken a shine to JoJo's Bizarre Adventure as of late, especially the super sadistic antagonists.
http://jjba.wikia.com/wiki/Diavolo
http://jjba.wikia.com/wiki/Dio_Brando
http://jjba.wikia.com/wiki/Kars
http://jjba.wikia.com/wiki/Funny_Valentine
Whether it be me or my characters drawn next to or fighting these villains, dressed as these villains, or vi
Life, Hell, a bit of both.
I would beat around the bush and rant, but here is a simple list of what happened while I was away:
Had to babysit an emotionally unstable friend and help him with girlfriend issues. (Me + Dating Advice = WTF?)
SOMEHOW fixed their relationship.
Got no scanner.
Slept a lot.
Texted a lot.
Got another new cat and dog. Total of five now.
Got into a fight with my dad.
Dad punched me in the sternum, my weak spot, and I nearly had a heart attack.
Literally cleaned an entire pig-sty on my own.
Passed out from a mix of back-pains,exhaustion, and some other condition I am still learning of, literally knocking me out for a day.
Cell phone bro
© 2013 - 2024 boo133
Comments1
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Oh nuuu
That happened to me too when we got our second dog XD, but you get use to these things. I am sure you'll feel better even though you can't come on a lot =3
That happened to me too when we got our second dog XD, but you get use to these things. I am sure you'll feel better even though you can't come on a lot =3